A Nursery Makeover that Tells a Story
Six years ago we found out that our journey to parenthood would be different than most. In the years that followed we visited many doctors and spoke to countless professionals about pregnancy and adoption-related options. One thing remained constant: we wanted to be parents. We loved being auntie and uncle, but the call to raise a child of our own was strong. We first found hope at CNY Fertility. Their Rochester office became a second home for Kayleigh during the fall of 2014. Our first attempt at making embryos ended in heartache, but we persisted and were lucky enough to have five embryos created from Kayleigh’s eggs and Josh’s sperm. These embryos were frozen as we searched to find a surrogate.
During our surrogate search, we also pursued adoption. In 2015 we found an agency we loved, Friends in Adoption. They are a non-profit, pro-choice, licensed agency with a focus on helping people make informed decisions concerning adoption. They are committed to open adoption, inclusiveness, and providing lifelong support to all members of the adoption circle. We had a consultation with a social worker of theirs based in Rochester and knew once we saved enough money for adoption, they would be our agency of choice.
In early 2016 we found a potential surrogate! A selfless, caring woman that was a new friend to us both. We began the process of making sure it was the right fit. Several doctor appointments later, we learned it was not safe for this wonderful woman to carry our child - and her safety was most important. We did the only thing we could at the time to regain some control of our lives, and put our plans and path to parenthood on hold. We decided to focus on being the best spouses, siblings, aunt/uncle, daughter/son, friends, coworkers, humans we could be. We knew that if we were meant to be bigger than a family of two humans and two dogs, it would happen.
In December of 2017, Kayleigh’s younger sister Emerald gave us the best Christmas gift: she offered to be our surrogate! Being genetically related to Kayleigh, Emerald was the best match for our surrogacy needs. We spent the next year getting all of our affairs in order, saving our money, and making the first attempt at an embryo transfer. Once again, we learned that miracles take time and patience. The first transfer did not implant, despite our best efforts and adherence to our IVF protocols. Emerald was a champ. She said to Kayleigh in a tearful, hormone-fueled phone call, “I can do it again, if you can.”
The protocol for IVF is not an easy one. A surrogate changes her daily routine, injects hormones, and fills her body with steroids and other medications, all in the hopes to make her womb a welcoming environment for someone else’s baby. The doctor does the transfer, but the embryo has to implant itself. We learned that our teeny tiny embryo miracle implanted on March 8, 2019! The weeks that followed were filled with continued hormone injections, other necessary medications, and weekly ultrasounds and bloodwork. Emerald took it all in stride. She is the embodiment of strength and compassion. She is a strong, brave woman, and the best auntie ever! She is giving us such an incredible gift, for which we will be eternally grateful.
We are so, so pleased and incredibly grateful to share with you that Baby Stamp is now the size of a peapod and strong enough to continue the journey to birth without extra hormones and medications. Our baby is due on Kayleigh and Emerald’s late father’s birthday: November 10!
We hope you enjoy the after photos of our nursery. We were fortunate enough to work with the ever patient and very talented Dominique of Caribago Designs & Photography to both create this look and photograph the end results. This room has been a way for us to nest, feel closer to the baby, and tell our story. Every nook and cranny marks a point on our journey to parenthood.
If you have questions about fertility, IVF, adoption, or just need someone to listen and truly hear your journey, please email Kayleigh on her personal email at Kayleigh.Stampfler@gmail.com. We hope our story (which is much longer and more complicated than indicated within this blog) can be used to help others. If you ever have questions about being a surrogate or need to talk with someone who has done it, email Emerald at enutting22@gmail.com.
If you or a loved one want help transforming a room in your home to better tell your story or set the stage for future memories, please email us at hello@stamppaints.com. Whatever the occasion, we are here to help!
Update: Our little peanut joined us on November 5, 2019. Click to meet our son, Emerick Levi Stampfler.
